She

We all know that one woman, the one who changes everything. She is strong and independent, turning heads the moment she walks into a room. Dominating anything that she sets her mind to; she is the definition of success. Refusing to be backed into a corner or forced to conform. She is the very definition of what you often refer to.

Known as the alpha woman in so many lights, she is the one everyone looks up to. From the outsider’s perspective, there isn’t anything she couldn’t do, anything she couldn’t be. Handling whatever it is life throws at her with grace, poise and confidence, she makes it look easy.

In many cases, she may have had to face a life far more difficult than most. Life dealt her lemons, testing her strength and resolve, daring her to give it all up.  Seen as an inspiration to many who know her; she gives the impressions that there is little she can’t handle.

When she is alone, however, there is another side of her that she never allows others to see. Underneath the strong, bold exterior, she hides away any ounce of vulnerability; burying away her pain, struggles and qualms. It’s not to say; she doesn’t feel them, for feeling them is the very core of who she is. She experiences heartbreak, failure, betrayal and disappointment every day, possibly more so than those near. But history has taught her to tuck away these feelings.

When life has ceased to be and it comes crashing down on you, she is the one you call. She is the one who is always there, without hesitation, reaching out a reassuring hand or shoulder to cry on. She speaks in wisdom and understanding. Listening to you share all of life’s struggles, nothing scares her off. She will never complain about your need of support, instead, she encourages you to reach out. Yet despite all of this, she will never tell you her own struggles or the tears that rock her to slumber.

She refuses to let life keep her down; she faces critism that inevitably follows a woman of strength and independence.  She’s been called a bitch, a whore, a liar, she’s had her authority questions, and been told to change her ways to better fit society’s expectation of women. Shrugging frivolously, she holds her head high and continues to move forward, motivating women in her path to dream a little bigger than before, to see things more clearly as they believe them to be.

What you don’t see however, what she hides from you, is the insecurity and doubt that lurks and tugs at her very being. That she secretly questions and doubts herself nearly every step of the way. She second guesses her abilities, and even entertains the idea that she may not actually be good enough. She is haunted each and every day by her inner voice, tearing her down and reinforcing her insecurities. However, she understands her role, and she recognizes the countless eyes that are on her; She is the type who refuses to let people down. Dowsed in a confident smile, she buries her fears and anxieties only to be released when she in the the safety of her own privacy.

Even her partner, should she have one, doesn’t truly have a sense of depth of her struggles. For her concern for other’s wellbeing and happiness supersedes most priorities. She is the one who will go out of her way to be there for her friends and family, through thick and thin, showing love, support and compassion. She refuses to be a burden with her own qualms. For she loves to a fault and fears that her pain will bring others down. Wanting nothing but the best for the ones she loves, she wants to shield them from even her own woes, for she understands the pain her stories bring.

There are days, where she wonders how she will keep going. Where she questions her strength, as she is entangled by the overwhelming burdens of her pains. She will long to cry out for help, to cry out to the people around her, yet her mind wont let her utter the words aloud. For in doing so it becomes the core of her vulnerability, and though it’s not that she doesn’t trust people, it’s hard for her to trust to show herself entirely in the presence of others. Instead, she tucks it all safely out of sight once more, and stands up, brushing aside her fears and struggles, ready to face another day.

She is strong

She is broken

She is intelligent

She is defiant

She is courageous

She is pure

She…

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